Asking for Trust
Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Matthew 6:33 (NKJV)
If the kingdom of God is within me then His righteousness is also found in me. I look inwardly and find the mystery divine – Christ in me, as me – and then I trust Him for the rightness of thought, purpose, and action in everything that follows. To trust Him is to proclaim no ability but His. Not too long ago, I thought to ask for wisdom (it served Solomon well) but instead my heart cried out for greater trust. With greater trust came a greater awareness of union. To trust God with increasing intensity is to dismiss the notion of separation altogether. If I trust God, then “I” am not a threat on any level. The “me” that I thought was my own roadblock is taken down by trust. This higher trust is destroying the illusion of a defective (yet somehow responsible) Susan.
Thoughts of independence and self-reliance (even those hidden in misused words like ”responsibility”) diminish trust. After all, if change depends on me then I have every reason to doubt. In truth, I cannot do anything until I”m abandoned to the truth that God is in full, total, and complete control. Unlimited trust becomes synonymous with union awareness. There is no separate “me” to depend on, trust in, or to expect something from; there”s no “me” to mess it up or get it right. I didn’t know it but when I pressed into the issues of trust I touched a life that was more real than ever before. Trust is the most authentic evidence of relationship. It is the fruit of union – the manifestation of His Person and Kingdom within. Each trusting step removes a little more old self-clutter from my view.
As I trust, my own opinions fall away. The release of mindsets can be painful but it always brings me a step closer to freedom. Trusting God as the all in all (trusting His authorship in all things) erases the old perceptions. The temporal is fading, but through union I am at home in His permanence. I am led to that which never changes within me – that which is already perfect, finished, and spotless. My requests meld in conformity to His will and they bring me to full agreement with all that He is in me.
Fear of the illusory self is gone when I trust God as my action. Introspection and analytic thinking fade. Hurt, anger, offense, insult, betrayal, loss, insecurity, and a myriad of other feelings are merely fear in disguise. The enemy distracts me with an offense to keep me from seeing the lack of trust therein. I lose the fear that forms the offense when I keep all things in God and accept all things as coming from His hand. Trust has become a bridge and it is closing the gap in my understanding. Truly, there is nothing to do, only something to see…and even that depends on Him. He who began the good work is faithful to complete it…