2008 – Page 3 – Windmills in Moonlight

Refining Choice

Post author:Susan
Post category:Paradox
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Conflicting forces refine choice. The contrast of bitter makes sweet all the sweeter. The seeming polar opposites of selfishness and selflessness exist to serve one another. Selfishness broadens the gap between the contradictions in life, selflessness will close that gap. Selfishness emphasizes differences, selflessness reveals the common ground. Selfishness magnifies problems, selflessness unveils solutions. Selfishness exposes faults, selflessness covers a multitude of sins. Here’s the paradox though: without selfishness, I will not arrive at selflessness.

One Relationship

Post author:Susan
Post category:Letting Go Union
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Christ is my problem, my solution, and my application of that solution. He is the “real me” and the erasure of dividing lines. He is the all in all, the common bond, and the unifying thread of creation. He unites my own being and increases my awareness of union with others. The fact of Christ increases everyone”s value.

Feelings of separation occur in my relationships only when I forget my union with Christ. When I take care of the root belief system, the branches bear good fruit. If I try to fix branches without nourishing the root, relationships weaken.

The key to restoration is underground. When the wind blows and branches sway, a strong root system enables a relationship to weather a storm. I trust the inner work. I’m not asked to fix any relationship; the perpetual motion of relationship that lives in me fixes everything. Remembering that I am one with Christ is the adjustment that allows all else to align accordingly.

Feelings are storm systems, temporal in nature. I feel what I feel, but I don’t allow feelings to form beliefs. Today’s rain is tomorrow’s sunshine. Truth is above the storm, a place undisturbed by gravitational pulls and shifting patterns of hot and cold, love and hate. I acknowledge, allow, accept, and even affirm my feelings, but then I run them through the sieve of truth. They serve their purpose, and then I let them go.

An Old Pattern

Post author:Susan
Post category:Choice Paradox
Post comments:4 Comments

Have you ever tried to “read people” to find the meaning behind their actions? This is a pattern that could be carried over from childhood. Children try on new friendships like shoes, looking for the ones that fit. We’ve all lost childhood friendships to what seemed like upgrades. Kids (not usually in touch with their motives) don’t often say why they’re “moving on,” they just treat the former friend differently. As this happens, we can feel the shift in their affection and if we misinterpreted the cue to “bug off,” their indifference can turn to cruelty. As children, we often have to figure out the “end” of a friendship by examining subtleties and inferences.

The pattern can carry into adulthood and we can waste a lot of energy looking for signs of the impending end of relationships. The tendency to “read people” entangles us and our experiences only strengthen the cords. We can easily take the approach of “taking the hint” when we feel we are no longer valued. If we don’t feel we are preferred we can feel replaced and think it is up to us to figure it out just by reading the “signs”.

If the pattern carries, we can expect the same behavior from God. We believe that He will only lead us indirectly; He’ll drop a few hints, and expect us to figure it out from there. If we miss the mark, we have to live with the consequence of our misstep. Translation: little movement for fear of choosing wrong. Our view is skewed! God is not cryptic; He says what He means. Parables are pictures, not puzzles.

Shifting our focus onto God’s ability to lead, rather than our perceived need to interpret is our way out of this misguided thinking. Along the way, I’ve learned that direct communication is important to me. I am frustrated and disheartened when indirect approaches are taken. I can handle the truth. Please don’t lie to me or coddle me. The truth doesn’t hurt nearly as much as what my mind does when left to its own analysis. My mind can splinter an interpretation in a million different directions, exhausting me in the process. Don’t be rude, unkind, or insensitive – speak the truth in love – but please, speak the truth…

Let our lives lovingly express truth [in all things, speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly]. Enfolded in love, let us grow up in every way and in all things into Him Who is the Head, [even] Christ… Ephesians 4:15 AMP

His Choice

Post author:Susan
Post category:Being Ourselves Choice
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As I leave self-scrutiny behind, the real “me” is free to emerge. My view into the heart of God is His choice for me; it’s the revelation of who He’s chosen to be in me. From this vantage point I see the scope of all He intends to be through me. I’m confident enough now to let me be – no matter how simplistic the view. It’s easy to adopt the expression of God in another, but I will ache until I am who He’s chosen to be in me. It is this that gives my heart its proper rhythm. Life is asking me to live while pointing out that the only life I will live is the life I will live right now. Life wants to make Pinocchio a real boy and give the Tin man a heart. I’ve longed for passion and now I know…when vision allows me to be me, then my passion for life will fuel my darkest hour.

Timing is Everything

Post author:Susan
Post category:Trust
Post comments:2 Comments

I don’t need to do great things; I just need to know that my life is Christ coming through to those I’ve known. It’s a simple dream… but it is mine. With this as my core, all other dreams are born.

Dreams spark desires and from desires requests are made; but good asking requires good timing. I ask when I am so full of the question that I cannot contain it any longer. With the asking comes a knowing that the answer is on its way; but not necessarily right around the corner. I may pass through deserts and valleys. I may experience the disappointment of delay and even try to create my own shortcuts; but I learn to trust even in the dark. Delay prepares me for what lies ahead. Every trial and seeming set back in life is an invitation to grow up. Trials transform me into a person who can sustain and appreciate the dream’s fulfillment.

I would really like the house to sell…YESTERDAY! Ultimately, I know that delay is present only because there are things that are being made ready. If the answer could come right away, it would. Since it’s not, I know it will do so just as soon as all the pieces are in place. To rely on perfect timing is to trust a bigger picture, a higher view, a Sovereign God. There is more than what currently meets the eye. When the parts align and come into focus the timing will make sense. To trust love is to never worry again about what seems to be delay.

So be it…

Trusting Motive

Post author:Susan
Post category:Letting Go
Post comments:2 Comments

If I won’t let go of the discourtesy of another (real or imaginary) then what will I do with it? Holding onto a lack of consideration in another (or my own for that matter) hurts. Forgiveness is a good starting place when looking for clear perspective. It’s a waste of time to determine if my perception of someone else’s action is accurate. To rely on mental discernment is to enter the twisted imaginings of a false and fleeting ego. Who I really am knows what is real versus mere projection and conjecture…more importantly, she knows what to do with what she knows. Imaginations are cast down when I let go – and easily executed when I remember there is no “me” who needs defending. In the circle of life, wrongs turn to rights and all things come back into the light. I can trust the heart, motive, and intentions of each person (including me) because I trust God. This is the purist view that’s simplifying my thought life. I see vessels of honor, green pastures, and rich fruit.

Meekness

Post author:Susan
Post category:Simplicity
Post comments:4 Comments

Meekness is a temperance of spirit that is neither elated nor cast down because it’s not occupied with itself in any way. It neither grumbles nor complains because it’s satisfied in any circumstance. I relate meekness to moderation and link it to Paul’s contentment whether abased or abounding.

Ask me, and I’d say I live moderately. My house is small, my possessions few. But the reason people live moderately determines meekness. Many who live moderately do so out of necessity or to protect against scarcity. People tend to create a controlled environment to safeguard against future lack. Fear is often impelling us to manage our affairs moderately. If we had more, we’d spend more, merely increasing the size of our controlled environment. Hence, we may look moderate but not possess a true spirit of meekness.

True moderation is born of the spirit with unselfish motives. It spends freely but without compulsion, gives generously but without coercion. Meekness sees abundance and humbly receives. To prosper is to graciously partake of the generous nature of God without the fear of greed. I once read a motto to counter balance greed which said: Do not take more than you can truly love.

We have possessions we don’t have time to truly love or even the heart to truly love it with. What might we give away if we lived by that motto? What might we live without? I’m convinced that in the absence of excess we will experience the joy of simplicity. As our hearts expand our lives will be filled with people, not things.

When I feel overwhelmed or discontent I clean a closet and give away what I don’t need. There’s a connection. The desire to downsize possessions is linked to the ache for freedom. The sale of the house represents freedom for me. I want to be debt-free; I want to pursue a dream of simple living, doing what I love, and living from faith-filled moments of trusting God.

More Glory

Post author:Susan
Post category:Simplicity
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“Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly; to venture on wider seas, where storms will show your mastery; where losing sight of land, we shall find the stars.” Author Unknown

I feel His disturbance, and trust His mastery. In losing sight of land, I shall find the moon and the stars!

The nation labels it an economic crisis. Many call it a recession, some say we’re on the edge of another depression. I say, God is good. The house is still on the market…the price has been lowered multiple times…and still no nibbles. It feels like it can’t go any lower…

Imagine a glass of water three quarters full with only one quarter of the glass left empty. Now picture the levels reversed…the glass is only a quarter full and is three quarters empty. The Lord is saying, “You want three quarter’s worth of security, and one quarter’s worth of my glory but I want to show you more of my glory than that!”

I’ve depended on the sale of the house to finance the future. I’d like a nice cushion, if you know what I mean!

Lowering the price again, this time more substantially, leaves plenty of room for God to reveal more of His glory through the absence of ‘security.’ The sale of the house alone would be miraculous at this point…foreclosures abound.

All I know is this…everything wants to feel scary and voices suggest that something has been missed (as though God’s not capable of making Himself heard, loud and clear). I will trust God at all costs and receive the good that He provides. I will know what I need to know when I need to know it. In the meantime, the flesh trembles…

The “Do-er” Within

Post author:Susan
Post category:Trust
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“There are two classes of Christians; the proud who imagine they are humble and the humble who are afraid they are proud. There should be another class; the self-forgetful who leave the whole thing in the hands of Christ and refuse to waste any time trying to make themselves good. They will reach the goal far ahead of the rest.” A.W. Tozer

A good quote to remind me that He who began a good work in me is faithful to complete it. It is God who is all the while at work within me causing me to both will (choose) and to work (take action) for His good pleasure. I am letting go of the thought, time, and energy I waste trying to untangle myself. I’d rather forget it and leave the whole thing to Christ. He is the great and mighty “Do-er” within.

Contrast is a Teacher

Post author:Susan
Post category:Letting Go Paradox
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I’ve questioned the wisdom of allowing tares to grow along side of the wheat. What good is it to live with such internal conflict? I’m beginning to see…the mind of the flesh remains because contrast is a great teacher. The flesh depicts a graphic image of impotence. The contrast between flesh and spirit creates the tension necessary for renewing the mind. The mind is being convinced that she is a servant, not a master. The soul wants what the new heart holds and still argues an ability to produce it independently.

Flesh is the instrument used to reprove her fallacy time and again. Retracing old memory patterns is a part of the process too; it’s a convenient agent of salvation. The mind retraces, but the spirit renews. The difference in function reinforces the soul’s need. In essence, flesh and spirit co-exist to save the soul. The flesh serves God by presenting opposition and resistance for the soul. He uses it to illustrate her inability to produce insight (or anything else) apart from Christ. Deception is lifted and union life becomes the liberating truth.

The cycle of failure is the renewing of the mind. It convinces the soul that she expresses thought, but does not originate it. Fear has always suggested that the flesh is our enemy, and so we resist it. In the end, truth prevails; what Satan means for evil God intends for good. The weakness of the flesh dispels a lie by shattering the soul’s illusion of independence. “Good” is the true view.