Love is God’s Action

After my last blog, Amanda and I shared how the paradox of selfishness and selflessness impacts relationships. I am reminding myself that God is the Spirit that makes all things holy, the Energy that makes life tangible, and the Love that overcomes all obstacles.  Apart from God, love is non-existent.  There are many counterfeits, but authentic love emanates from God, through me, and toward you.  If you are able to receive love through me, then that too is God’s love.  His love is both the giving and the receiving of love.  Love is God’s action on our behalf.

God loves unconditionally because love is Who He is, not something He has.  He loves in response to Himself.  His love is not based upon who I am or what I’ve done.  He doesn’t love me because I’m loveable; He loves me because He is love.

Here’s the stretch… love is now the true nature of my being (in union with Christ).  Therefore, I love because it is who I know myself to be.  I love because it is right for me to love.  To be true to myself is to love unconditionally because the fact of my loving is no longer based upon how you behave.  I offer love with no strings attached.  I am not looking for something from you in return for my love.  I won’t love you more if you progress and I won’t love you less if you digress.  In the true spirit of loving there is no perceived benefit to the lover.  Love is given purely for the sake of the one who will receive that gift.

Obviously this is unearthly love…it comes from someone greater than myself.  Apart from Him… nothing.

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Refining Choice

Conflicting forces refine choice.  The contrast of bitter makes sweet all the sweeter. The seeming polar opposites of selfishness and selflessness exist to serve one another.  Selfishness broadens the gap between the contradictions in life, selflessness will close that gap.  Selfishness emphasizes differences, selflessness reveals the common ground.  Selfishness magnifies problems, selflessness unveils solutions. Selfishness exposes faults, selflessness covers a multitude of sins.  Here’s the paradox though: without selfishness, I will not arrive at selflessness.

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One Relationship

Christ is my problem, my solution, and my application of that solution. He is the “real me” and the erasure of dividing lines.  He is the all in all, the common bond, and the unifying thread of creation. He unites my own being and increases my awareness of union with others.  The fact of Christ increases everyone”s value.

Feelings of separation occur in my relationships only when I forget my union with Christ.  When I take care of the root belief system, the branches bear good fruit.  If I try to fix branches without nourishing the root, relationships weaken.

The key to restoration is underground.  When the wind blows and branches sway, a strong root system enables a relationship to weather a storm.  I trust the inner work.  I’m not asked to fix any relationship; the perpetual motion of relationship that lives in me fixes everything.  Remembering that I am one with Christ is the adjustment that allows all else to align accordingly.

Feelings are storm systems, temporal in nature.  I feel what I feel, but I don’t allow feelings to form beliefs.  Today’s rain is tomorrow’s sunshine. Truth is above the storm, a place undisturbed by gravitational pulls and shifting patterns of hot and cold, love and hate.  I acknowledge, allow, accept, and even affirm my feelings, but then I run them through the sieve of truth.  They serve their purpose, and then I let them go.

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An Old Pattern

Have you ever tried to “read people” to find the meaning behind their actions?  This is a pattern that could be carried over from childhood. Children try on new friendships like shoes, looking for the ones that fit.  We’ve all lost  childhood friendships to what seemed like upgrades. Kids (not usually in touch with their motives) don’t often say why they’re “moving on,” they just treat the former friend differently. As this happens, we can feel the shift in their affection and if we misinterpreted the cue to “bug off,” their indifference can turn to cruelty.  As children, we often have to figure out the “end” of a friendship by examining subtleties and inferences.

The pattern can carry into adulthood and we can waste a lot of energy looking for signs of the impending end of relationships.  The tendency to “read people” entangles us and our experiences only strengthen the cords.  We can easily take the approach of “taking the hint” when we feel we are no longer valued.  If we don’t feel we are preferred we can feel replaced and think it is up to us to figure it out just by reading the “signs”.

If the pattern carries, we can expect the same behavior from God.  We believe that He will only lead us indirectly; He’ll drop a few hints, and expect us to figure it out from there. If we miss the mark, we have to live with the consequence of our misstep. Translation:  little movement for fear of choosing wrong. Our view is skewed!  God is not cryptic; He says what He means.  Parables are pictures, not puzzles.

Shifting our focus onto God’s ability to lead, rather than our perceived need to interpret is our way out of this misguided thinking.  Along the way, I’ve learned that direct communication is important to me.  I am frustrated and disheartened when indirect approaches are taken.  I can handle the truth. Please don’t lie to me or coddle me.  The truth doesn’t hurt nearly as much as what my mind does when left to its own analysis.  My mind can splinter an interpretation in a million different directions, exhausting me in the process.  Don’t be rude, unkind, or insensitive – speak the truth in love – but please, speak the truth…

Let our lives lovingly express truth [in all things, speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly]. Enfolded in love, let us grow up in every way and in all things into Him Who is the Head, [even] Christ…    Ephesians 4:15 AMP

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His Choice

As I leave self-scrutiny behind, the real “me” is free to emerge.  My view into the heart of God is His choice for me; it’s the revelation of who He’s chosen to be in me.  From this vantage point I see the scope of all He intends to be through me.  I’m confident enough now to let me be – no matter how simplistic the view.  It’s easy to adopt the expression of God in another, but I will ache until I am who He’s chosen to be in me.  It is this that gives my heart its proper rhythm. Life is asking me to live while pointing out that the only life I will live is the life I will live right now.  Life wants to make Pinocchio a real boy and give the Tin man a heart.  I’ve longed for passion and now I know…when vision allows me to be me, then my passion for life will fuel my darkest hour.

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Timing is Everything

I don’t need to do great things; I just need to know that my life is Christ coming through to those I’ve known.  It’s a simple dream… but it is mine.  With this as my core, all other dreams are born.

Dreams spark desires and from desires requests are made; but good asking requires good timing.  I ask when I am so full of the question that I cannot contain it any longer.   With the asking comes a knowing that the answer is on its way; but not necessarily right around the corner.  I may pass through deserts and valleys.  I may experience the disappointment of delay and even try to create my own shortcuts; but I learn to trust even in the dark. Delay prepares me for what lies ahead.  Every trial and seeming set back in life is an invitation to grow up.  Trials transform me into a person who can sustain and appreciate the dream’s fulfillment.

I would really like the house to sell…YESTERDAY!  Ultimately, I know that delay is present only because there are things that are being made ready.  If the answer could come right away, it would.  Since it’s not, I know it will do so just as soon as all the pieces are in place.  To rely on perfect timing is to trust a bigger picture, a higher view, a Sovereign God.  There is more than what currently meets the eye.  When the parts align and come into focus the timing will make sense.  To trust love is to never worry again about what seems to be delay.

So be it…

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Trusting Motive

If I won’t let go of the discourtesy of another (real or imaginary) then what will I do with it?  Holding onto a lack of consideration in another (or my own for that matter) hurts.  Forgiveness is a good starting place when looking for clear perspective.  It’s a waste of time to determine if my perception of someone else’s action is accurate.  To rely on mental discernment is to enter the twisted imaginings of a false and fleeting ego. Who I really am knows what is real versus mere projection and conjecture…more importantly, she knows what to do with what she knows.  Imaginations are cast down when I let go – and easily executed when I remember there is no “me” who needs defending.  In the circle of life, wrongs turn to rights and all things come back into the light. I can trust the heart, motive, and intentions of each person (including me) because I trust God.  This is the purist view that’s simplifying my thought life.  I see vessels of honor, green pastures, and rich fruit.

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